beautiful promise

i wonder ... ("_)

Thursday, January 11, 2007 / 6:48 PM

wow ... time flies lo ... it was like just school reopen but now ... this is the second week of school liao ... fast ah ... haha ... i thought it would be a nice to start everything afresh ... forgettin abt all the bads , rememberin only the good ones ... make it a memories ... as it is a new year afterall ... so it would be great tat everything will work out well ... and things like tat ah ... but ... to wat i did not expect ... things would will turn out to be something tat i dun see anyone tat will benefit from ... well ... as i had wrote in my pervious blogs ... things had kind of cock up between some classmate ... dun noe why but just a very tense feelin tat things dun have to ended up it this way or it should never even in the first place makin everyone to feel so fucked up ... dun noe ... but is just certain decision , judgement , comment or watever is it tat makes things turn out tat way ... wasnt really nice to make things so tense out ... after we still have to like face each other 5 days a week and a average of half a day facin each other ... afterall it does not look nice ... and wat worst is not the misunderstandin tat they have put me into ... but is tat they have actually did not see the point of those things which was done ... i dun noe how should i like phrase it but i started everything at a means of good intention ... afterall is not nice seein friends to break out with each other ... each walkin their ways ... whereby i onli feel tat friends should nv be so complicated ... and walkin through things together ... but things just did not happen as wat i started it off with ... it just became a misunderstandin tat ppl feels tat im like the devil ? spoilin their friendship and stuff like tat ... which i did not even meant to do or maybe it wasnt wat i think of in the very first place ... true , the previous - title : to who it may concern . doesnt sound very nice ... but i meant it ... i only can use this way to shout watever i really wanna say ... simply just imagine ... ppl just cant accept the comment tat i have said ... and thinks tat im makin things against them ... omg ... hao ren zhen nian zuo ... im actually fine with ppl callin watever they wanna or feel like callin me ... i fine with it ... bascially i dun mind ... because i understand tat there is always a reason behind every decision ... but isnt it not very nice for u to call me tat if i have nv call u tat ... to be honest ... i dun mind jia yuan from callin me bitch , slut , aiyo watever she can think of to call me ... simply because tat is wat i did to her too ma ... like disturb her in class ... things like tat ... so i totally understand the reason of why she is callin me tat ... but how abt the others ... i had never dislike someone so much or even hate someone to the core because i just hope everything to be peaceful ... is not very nice for me to go around doin something tat is not very nice ma ... tat why ... so i would always like go around kpo here and kpo there ... haha ... like spreadin my joy with those around me ... but i sometime think whether did i ever did the rite thing or not ... i can simply go sround to share or listen to other's people if they care to share ... but wat will i get in return ? i ask myself many times the same question whenever i come across those sad , heartbroken event tat happen to others ... i console them , advice them , everything tat i could think of to do to at least put a smile back on their face , will they simply just dun give me a dam when i face the same problem as they did ... i nv claim any credit from anyone tat cross over my life with those unhappy event and leave my life with at least feelin tat they are actually not alone ... at least someone is there to listen and cared ? but simply things did not happen .. or maybe i least expect those returns will ever turn out to like this ... get those feelin how i feelin ... i wonder ? is okie ... dun noe how to carry on le ... so thought of just stoppin here ba ... maybe if like u r readin this post ... at least tell me at my tag if how i should carry things on like ... whether i should continue to like console those who cross over my life ... or simply just leave them alone ... sometimes it better to noe less , comment less or is better to dun be a kpo to bother things tat does not bother or concern abt me de ... aiyo ... confused !!! i really dun noe le ... gonna stop here ...